The Progressive Dictionary

Liberal – Outmoded, outdated term for the modern Progressive.

Progressive – NOT a commie. Not a socialist. Not a Liberal. Not a leftist. Middle of the road common sense Democrat type. Enlightened political elite.

Multicultural – Embracing all cultures, except those which are uniquely of the United States of America.

Diversity – See definition for Multicultural. Add a racial context, of course.

Family Values – Those values of all cultures, including those of decadence and those of terrorism, while rejecting those of conservatism, God, or Christianity.

Patriot – One who engages in unwarranted nationalistic pride for this United States of America; a warmongering conservative Republican.

Military Defense – Baby-killing American war machine. A product of the Right-Wing Conservative political hate party.

Conservative – Right-Wing hate monger, bigot, racist, homophobe; usually a Republican Christian. The enemy

Republican – See definition for Conservative.

Christian – Racist, bigot, homophobe hate monger; hell bent on converting the world and destroying atheist secular progressives. The enemy

Activist – One who actively promotes the secular progressive agenda. One who participates in every possible protest march, even if this means never having a job or taking a bath.

Taxes – Voluntary “contribution” to support “social justice” and society. Maximum enforced obligatory corporate contribution.

Illegal Alien – Undocumented immigrant.

Capitalism – System by which the rich get richer and the poor get poorer; all workers are slaves; the conservative method for plundering the earth’s natural resources.

Communism – The Workers’ Paradise. A system of true equality and social justice. Just ask Marx, Lenin, Stalin, Mao, Pol Pot, Castro.

Extremists - Anyone who speaks out or in any way opposes the learned views of the Progressive Elite. The enemy.

Terrorist – A peaceful, misunderstood follower of noble Islam. Not a bloody killer or radical militant. Our friends whom we should seek to know better.

Nazi – See definition for Conservative.

Fascist – See definition for Conservative.

Self-Esteem – A perfectly nihilistic, uncritical, non-competitive view of oneself.

Unilateral - The type of action taken when the United States goes to war without France's, The UN's, and Jane Fonda's permission.

Freedom of Speech - Something every citizen ought to have a right to, unless you're a Conservative. Then it's Hate Speech, and should be censored.

Affirmative Action – “A quota system based on racial preference.” Or so say the neo-con liars.

Neo-con – New version of the old Fascist Nazi. Not to be trusted. The enemy.